Crush All Hipsters!

I took the bike into work today as I knew the roads would be quiet as it’s Good Friday and because it means I can get in before the bosses turn up, and away before they annoy me too much.  The ride in is functional, but not particularly enjoyable as there’s not much to look at on the way. On the way back through I took a detour out through the botanic gardens, Kirklee and even as far as Anniesland Cross just for the sheer enjoyment of riding around in the spring sunshine.

And then I noticed the hipsters.

The Botanic Gardens were riddled with them. HUNDREDS of them, all dressed up in their strangely similar, but allegedly “individual” manner and almost all of them were wearing glasses with plain glass in them. It was a moment of realisation akin to that point in Invasion of the Body Snatchers when Donald Sutherland realises everyone around him has been replaced by alien pod people.

At that moment I had a quick JD from Scrubs style daydream where my bike became a monster truck, and the gentle clicking of my free-wheel became the pleasing sound of their trendy bones, macbooks and iphones being ground under my massive monster tyres.

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